April 6,2011
Daddy, Mommy, Big Brother Kaelin, Angel Nolan Kentuck You were only with us for a whisper, but you were loved from the moment we found out.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Sweet Heart
April 6,2011
Daddy, Mommy, Big Brother Kaelin, Angel Nolan Kentuck You were only with us for a whisper, but you were loved from the moment we found out.
Makenah Ann Ridley
Makenah Ann Ridley
Born into Heaven on January 29th 2011
Don't let them say I wasn't born, that something stopped my heart
I felt each tender squeeze you gave, I've loved you from the start
Although my body you can't hold it doesn't mean I'm gone
This world was not worthy, not of me, God chose that I move on
I know the pain that drowns your soul, what you are forced to face
You have my word, I'll fill your arms, someday we will embrace
You'll hear that it was meant to be, God doesn't make mistakes
But that won't soften your worst day, or make your heart not ache
I'm watching over all you do, another child you'll bear
Believe me when I say to you, that I am always there
There will come a time, I promise you, that you will hold my hand,
Stroke my face, and kiss my lips, and then you'll understand
Although I've never breathed your air or gazed into your eyes
That doesn't mean I never was, an angel never dies
Mommy and Daddy love and miss you so much Makenah!
Born into Heaven on January 29th 2011
Don't let them say I wasn't born, that something stopped my heart
I felt each tender squeeze you gave, I've loved you from the start
Although my body you can't hold it doesn't mean I'm gone
This world was not worthy, not of me, God chose that I move on
I know the pain that drowns your soul, what you are forced to face
You have my word, I'll fill your arms, someday we will embrace
You'll hear that it was meant to be, God doesn't make mistakes
But that won't soften your worst day, or make your heart not ache
I'm watching over all you do, another child you'll bear
Believe me when I say to you, that I am always there
There will come a time, I promise you, that you will hold my hand,
Stroke my face, and kiss my lips, and then you'll understand
Although I've never breathed your air or gazed into your eyes
That doesn't mean I never was, an angel never dies
Mommy and Daddy love and miss you so much Makenah!
Nolan
Nolan
Born sleeping at 39 weeks on August 23, 2010
Kentucky
We think about you, and miss you every day. Your big brother Kaelin asked me today when he would be able to kiss you and play soilders together. Nolan, you were and still are so loved.
There is a new angel up there with you, show your sibling all the glory that is heaven.
Daddy, Mommy, and big brother Kaelin.
Born sleeping at 39 weeks on August 23, 2010
Kentucky
We think about you, and miss you every day. Your big brother Kaelin asked me today when he would be able to kiss you and play soilders together. Nolan, you were and still are so loved.
There is a new angel up there with you, show your sibling all the glory that is heaven.
Daddy, Mommy, and big brother Kaelin.
David Henry Hillis
David Henry Hillis
Born May 11th, 2010 - Passed away January 24th, 2011
Ohio, USA
To my sweet Capt Snuggles,
David Henry, this is a hard letter to write. I wish that it was a rambling account of how things are this year, historical facts to remember , events to recount for when you grow old. But therein lies the problem. I write this letter because I know in my heart of hearts - you will never grow old. Those words rip out my heart and make me weep. I am at a loss on how to say goodbye.
Can I be honest with you? I was devastated when I learned I was pregnant again. Your dad and I, we were on the verge of divorce. We agreed to ""try and work things out"" - that's code for we had sex and I got pregnant. I know, I know - your delicate ears don't want to hear such talk from your mama, but I want you to understand, no matter how I felt before you were born - I loved you completely when you arrived.
You were beautiful, such a head of hair! The dark color was deceiving, you were hiding all that red until we took to the sun and then you were breath-taking. We did a lot in those first 3 months in spite of the weekly doctors appointments and the mandated round the clock feedings. Your brothers were so in love with you - they argued about who got to hold you first.
Jacob won, of course - his is your oldest little brother and he adored you. He even learned to change your diaper, he was quite proficient for being only 7 years old.
Jonathan always wanted to sit with me when you took your bottle, he would try and hold the bottle for you, but you had to have the bottle just so and we ended up making a mess. Regardless, he was always concerned about you and your bottles.
And then there was Zachary, he loved to bring you toys, pile them on you, as a matter of fact. Sometimes I would find the oddest things stacked up in your little bouncy chair besides you. He always had a toy for 'baby'.
We went so many places during those warm months. We took the big boys and your cousins bowling almost every week, sometimes twice. We ate lunch every day at the church - those church ladies just loved on you every chance they got. Miss Dodie called you her ""puddin' pie"", I know she will be heartbroken now that you're gone.
Many, many people are heart-broken that you're gone, none more so than I. I know, with absolute conviction, that I did the best I could for you. I know that the liver transplant was the only option at the hope for a normal life. I suppose that's what it came down to, a hope.
But even for all those months in the hospital, there were bright times. I treasure each and every time I got to rock you or hold you, or simply bathe you.
Every time you opened your eyes it elicited murmurs of delight from myself and all your faithful Chaperones. I know your lullabies are playing softly where ever your sweet soul is.
I enjoyed reading to you every chance I had and I can only hope Great-Grandma Demko finishes reading A House at Pooh Corner to you, since we had only just begun reading it.
I have to say goodbye to your body today, but not your spirit, never your spirit. My arms ache to hold you once more and my chest is full of the shards of my broken heart. These past 5 months have been a marathon, a marathon of love and devotion that so many people are amazed at. But I acted in the only way I knew how. To be with you, to nurture you, to be your mama in the same way I am mama to your siblings before you.
You are held in the hearts of so very many people. I shared you with the world and received love and support back ten-fold. Was your purpose to help one of these strangers? Was your purpose to help me?
Know that I love you more than these simple words can convey. I am honored that you chose me to be your mama. You will always be my Capt Snuggles.
Born May 11th, 2010 - Passed away January 24th, 2011
Ohio, USA
To my sweet Capt Snuggles,
David Henry, this is a hard letter to write. I wish that it was a rambling account of how things are this year, historical facts to remember , events to recount for when you grow old. But therein lies the problem. I write this letter because I know in my heart of hearts - you will never grow old. Those words rip out my heart and make me weep. I am at a loss on how to say goodbye.
Can I be honest with you? I was devastated when I learned I was pregnant again. Your dad and I, we were on the verge of divorce. We agreed to ""try and work things out"" - that's code for we had sex and I got pregnant. I know, I know - your delicate ears don't want to hear such talk from your mama, but I want you to understand, no matter how I felt before you were born - I loved you completely when you arrived.
You were beautiful, such a head of hair! The dark color was deceiving, you were hiding all that red until we took to the sun and then you were breath-taking. We did a lot in those first 3 months in spite of the weekly doctors appointments and the mandated round the clock feedings. Your brothers were so in love with you - they argued about who got to hold you first.
Jacob won, of course - his is your oldest little brother and he adored you. He even learned to change your diaper, he was quite proficient for being only 7 years old.
Jonathan always wanted to sit with me when you took your bottle, he would try and hold the bottle for you, but you had to have the bottle just so and we ended up making a mess. Regardless, he was always concerned about you and your bottles.
And then there was Zachary, he loved to bring you toys, pile them on you, as a matter of fact. Sometimes I would find the oddest things stacked up in your little bouncy chair besides you. He always had a toy for 'baby'.
We went so many places during those warm months. We took the big boys and your cousins bowling almost every week, sometimes twice. We ate lunch every day at the church - those church ladies just loved on you every chance they got. Miss Dodie called you her ""puddin' pie"", I know she will be heartbroken now that you're gone.
Many, many people are heart-broken that you're gone, none more so than I. I know, with absolute conviction, that I did the best I could for you. I know that the liver transplant was the only option at the hope for a normal life. I suppose that's what it came down to, a hope.
But even for all those months in the hospital, there were bright times. I treasure each and every time I got to rock you or hold you, or simply bathe you.
Every time you opened your eyes it elicited murmurs of delight from myself and all your faithful Chaperones. I know your lullabies are playing softly where ever your sweet soul is.
I enjoyed reading to you every chance I had and I can only hope Great-Grandma Demko finishes reading A House at Pooh Corner to you, since we had only just begun reading it.
I have to say goodbye to your body today, but not your spirit, never your spirit. My arms ache to hold you once more and my chest is full of the shards of my broken heart. These past 5 months have been a marathon, a marathon of love and devotion that so many people are amazed at. But I acted in the only way I knew how. To be with you, to nurture you, to be your mama in the same way I am mama to your siblings before you.
You are held in the hearts of so very many people. I shared you with the world and received love and support back ten-fold. Was your purpose to help one of these strangers? Was your purpose to help me?
Know that I love you more than these simple words can convey. I am honored that you chose me to be your mama. You will always be my Capt Snuggles.
Tyson Zammit
Tyson Zammit
Born 7th July 2009
Passed away 30th October 2010
Sydney Australia
I loved you the minute I heard your heart beat and the minute you were born. Then I saw your face and I fell in love with you even more. I miss our funny games we got up to and your infectious laugh. You touched everyone's hearts where ever we were. I will forever walk around with a scar across my heart. I love you son…and I know you know I would do anything to have you back. Im so sorry, please forgive me. My silent tears for you will secretly fall… as strong as I am to survive this at the thought of your name I feel my shield crumble. You will forever remain in my heart. I miss you so much
Love Mumma xxxx
Born 7th July 2009
Passed away 30th October 2010
Sydney Australia
I loved you the minute I heard your heart beat and the minute you were born. Then I saw your face and I fell in love with you even more. I miss our funny games we got up to and your infectious laugh. You touched everyone's hearts where ever we were. I will forever walk around with a scar across my heart. I love you son…and I know you know I would do anything to have you back. Im so sorry, please forgive me. My silent tears for you will secretly fall… as strong as I am to survive this at the thought of your name I feel my shield crumble. You will forever remain in my heart. I miss you so much
Love Mumma xxxx
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Ryan Jon McDonald
Ryan Jon McDonald
Born sleeping on 17 September 2010
(39w4d)
Australia
Don't think of him as gone away,
His Journey's just begun.
Life holds so many facets,
This earth is only one.
Just think of him as resting
From the sorrows & the tears
In a place of warmth & comfort
Where there are no days & years.
Thinking how he must be wishing
That we could know today,
How nothing but our sorrows
Can really pass away.
And think of him as living
In the hearts of those he touched,
For nothing loved is ever lost
And he was loved so much.
Born sleeping on 17 September 2010
(39w4d)
Australia
Don't think of him as gone away,
His Journey's just begun.
Life holds so many facets,
This earth is only one.
Just think of him as resting
From the sorrows & the tears
In a place of warmth & comfort
Where there are no days & years.
Thinking how he must be wishing
That we could know today,
How nothing but our sorrows
Can really pass away.
And think of him as living
In the hearts of those he touched,
For nothing loved is ever lost
And he was loved so much.
